Getting there

Okay so i decided that after years of being envious of gifted individuals, im going to learn acoustic guitar. I should admit in fear of misleading you to commend my determination, i have tried before and failed miserably at trivial basics such as plucking a string right or even reaching over the huge body of it, and with a swift severance of patience I scrapped the persuit immdediately.
I have lived in awe of those possessing unearthly talent, the greats such as Jimi Hendrix, Joe santriani, steve vai, slash and the most underrated bon jovi guitarist Richie Sambora. Therefore I believe its about time i got my name in neon lights next to theirs, so to speak.
I dubiously picked up an old, dusty and shamefully neglected set of strings and picked my brain for a half learnt tune...of all songs my memory could have chosen, i recalled the ridiculously hard guns n roses sweet child of mine. Needless to say, that session didnt last long. So i turned to what i always turn to in times of need...facebook, and posted a status regarding my fledgling hobby...soon enough i had offers from many a rocking friend offering to teach me all the wise ways and means to be a guitar god.
The next day i set off for college with a smile and carrying the trusty old guitar, on the way to meet my future bandmates. 3 hours, 3 coffees and 4 sore fingers later, i had learnt the intro to Shinedown-45 and with much persuasion and shameless begging, got said friend to write the tabs down so i could master it at home in privacy without people laughing at my pathetic excuse for strumming.
And here i am, 4 weeks later, and im just past the prechorus, yet again sick with envy after watching the talented people on youtube, not only perfecting the chords but singing along too.
My stubby digits wont stretch from fret 3 to fret 5 for the most played chord of the chorus but hey...ive learnt what a capo is, mastered a G chord and i can name every part of an acoustic (the overall name for mine is Blue, which came to me in a stroke of genius after observing the colour of its soundbox...)
One day ill rock it ;)
Ill keep you posted on my progress haha.

Existing

It pains me to breath in when you're not breathing the same air,
it worries me to sleep when i know you're not there,
it hurts me to cry when you can't wipe away my tears,
however will i cope until you get here,
i close my eyes and focus on the ache,
I can hear a shattering sound as my heart breaks,
I try to feel your arms around me, or imagine your kiss,
but without memory of your touch, hope does'nt exist,
I try and fall into the song,
and absorb the words into my soul,
but listening without you just feels wrong
and it does'nt bring you close enough,
the song cant make me whole,
I run into the night to leave the pain behind,
but my feet stop running
my body and mind collide,
if i lay here on the ground, still enough to fool them all,
will the angels think i died for love and dutifully send you to my door?
I search for a way of bringing you into my life,
I make up memories of us, past all this strife,
yet reality shows no mercy
and it drags me from my sanctuary,
God, speed him to these open arms
please...show some sympathy

To an old friend

Circumstances and life in general can tear friendships apart, People change, life goes on and all thats left is painful memories of losing that bond but also happy ones from all the good times shared.


We used to tell each other everything and now we dont even say hello anymore, things change and suddenly she dont need me to be the friend she once valued so much. I dont know how or when exactly it happened but we drifted from those things that once bound us together and shes no longer the angel in my life. A part of me will always hope that one day we'll bridge this gap but another part sadly accepts that sometimes the only thing to do is to move on with the void that is so hard to fill. There are songs and photos that will always remind me of the times when we had each other to lean on, to laugh with and make memories. Those memories of my best friend that ill cherish forever no matter where i end up or who i meet.

We never said goodbye to our forgotten friendship but now its been buried in the past, ive only got one thing left to say....
Although some things do change, my promise to be there for you hasnt.

The lonely bench

My beach...My bench.
I like to think of it that way at least, as i stroll along the sea front, sorting through my head of cluttered thoughts and breathing in the salty sea air. I have been to some beautiful places in my life, seen the snow-topped mountains of derbyshire, even climbed one, the deep valleys of the lake district and green grassy hills of wales, but nothing beats my bench, my place of comfort.
I reach my destination and take a minute to absorb the scene in front of me when it strikes me that i may not be the only person who thinks of this bench as my own...how many other people have stopped in this very place over time, different people of all ages?
Children have climbed on it, with their rapidly melting ice-cream. Elderly couples have sat on it, with fish and chips, enjoying the waves and memories. Young couples gazing into each others eyes and longing for nothing more than to get away from this very bench, this very town. What things must this weathered bench have seen,what stories could it tell?
Here it sits, in silent solitude, watching the world go by...I like to join it in doing so sometimes.

I dream of travelling, and leaving this small town behind, every day it seems to get smaller and smaller, being right on the coast doesnt help the feeling of isolation, big fish in a small pond they say...destined for bigger things. I only pray this is true.
But where else would i find such a place of contentment...than this worn out companion and the memories of yesterday.